The journey

This was a reminder that I needed to read!

I was going to talk about the start of being on PD--getting the catheter, flushing the line, etc. but I came across the above quote and had a bit of an aha moment on Friday that I've been ruminating over all weekend.  So next time I'll write about all that fun stuff. :)

On Friday, I was in an orientation session at my new job and I really--I mean, REALLY--realized that other people have their own shit going on. Yes, dialysis is a big thing, but other things are big for other people. My issues are important because they are my issues, the same as other people's issues are important to them because they are their issues. Have I said this already? The woman sitting next to me was diabetic, the woman across from me had some kind of lymphedema condition. For them, those things are a part of who they are. They have to manage their conditions on a daily basis, the same way I do. And we are all more than our disease or condition.

Of course I know that, and I'll say it to other people, but do I believe it? Not everyday.

I think acceptance can be hard. I think it's OK to grieve for the things you might miss. For example, unless I have a transplant, I can't have children. Am I OK with that? Mostly, yes. Do I still need to grieve? Yes. And I have to give myself permission to do so.

You have to give yourself permission to get pissed off, to cry, to rant, to be happy, to chase your dreams, to fall in or out of love, to LIVE. We are on a journey. We are not planning to arrive at a destination (say, a successful transplant) and THEN live. We want to live NOW. To embrace what is happening now. I am not always grateful for this life on dialysis, but I should be thankful every single day because every single day it means I am alive. I woke up this morning and I was breathing. That's a pretty good day already. :)

So I learned a lesson this weekend that other people have big things going on in their lives and that I am not the only one. We all have a story. Take time to listen to what other people have to say. We are all on a journey. Join up with other people and connect.
Accept it. Embrace it. Rock it.:)

RachelT